Fear and Relationships


Back in the late 1800’s, while Thomas Edison was entertaining a guest, he shared that it had taken 10,000 different experiments before he perfected the invention of the light bulb. The guest responded with something like, “It’s amazing that you had to endure 9,999 failures until you got it right.” Edison snapped back, “Those weren’t failures. I just discovered 9,999 ways that light bulbs don’t work.”

Failure isn’t a reality, it is an idea that takes on power according to how much truth we attach to it in any given situation. It’s one thing to say, “I gave it a shot and it didn’t work.” It’s another thing to proclaim, “I failed.” The former sounds like a temporary setback, while the latter sounds like a permanent blot on your record.

Each relationship that ends up in separation is only a temporary setback and not a failure.

The fear of failure is more prevalent in the world of relationships since the 60s. You may be one of many who have said, “I invested so much time into this relationship. If I walk away now, it will mean that I failed.” Why is that your belief? The only thing you would really be walking away with is the discovery of how a relationship doesn’t work.

When you do not try, that is the true failure. The willingness to take chances reveals a strong personality. When you discover that the relationship is not working, sit back and ask yourself, “Does it make me a failure to leave this unhappy situation or does it make me a failure to stick around when I know it isn’t going to change?”

The fundamental failure in most relationships is that one has a huge shopping list of attributes the partner has, rather than attributes that you have to offer to the relationship.

“Divine sound is the cause of all manifestation. The knower of the mystery of sound knows the mystery of the whole universe.”
― Hazrat Inayat Khan

For a man, the sense of failure may haunt him until he finds another relationship. Where else a woman holds the memories of her lover within the cells of the Yoni for as long as 5 years. Since there are two nadis connecting the Yoni to the 5th chakra and influencing all the chakras along the way.


In the 4 years as a relationship and spiritual coach, I have met many who began pursuing their next partner while they’re still committed to the one that’s making them unhappy. This is not recommended, especially for women because the Yoni is a Sacred Vessel also known as the Sacred Grail which holds the energies of the men.


There are no shortcuts in the pursuit of love. Both men and women need some time to work on themselves until the right person comes along. With women, the memories within the Yoni have to removed before being ready to share love again.


Bija Mantra can reprogram the DNA as wells get rid of past cellular memories.


Tantric Inner Sakthi Yoga Sadhana can help you with a working program to reprogram your DNA and experience freedom from fear.